Tsuchan's Rules
by DarkestEnd
Summary: Apparently, even the soft Decimo gets angry. Rated M to be safe. Implied 1827 and 8059.
1. Chapter 1: The Rules

Disclaimer: I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn!

Why don't I own it? D:

WARNING: Implied 1827 and 8059. Cuz' you know. They ARE OTP.

* * *

The everyday of a Vongola Decimo is not completely average. He either has to deal with a perverted pineapple stalking him through every corridor, or the violent skylark whom keep pestering him about a "punishment" that usually occurs in said person's bedroom. Of course, he decided there needed to be a few rules set down, and that included all unnecessary explosions of dynamite through his estate.

oOoOoOoOoOo

"Everyone needs to come to the meeting. That's final."

The angry tuna marched to the meeting room as the rest of the Vongola family stared in shock. They'd never seen their boss/lover, in some cases friend, that angry since the X-Burner-Pineapple incident. Deciding that they didn't want to be exclusively fried by the pure flames their Decimo held, they followed him to the room in unison.

All six guardians sat down in their respectiver seats nervously, excluding the fact that skylark and pineapple were smirking.

"All right, I know that everyone has matured over the years you've became my guardians, and I respect that. It's just; could you not hold your fights in my home, traumatize the maids and butlers, steal my boxers, throw dynamite everywhere, keep making noises that can even scare the security outside, stop wielding tonfas and proclaiming everyone as "herbivore", keep your boxes closed for at least a day, and not steal my boxers? Wait, I said that already; but seriously. What's the point of stealing my boxers?"

"Kufu-"

"Don't 'Kufufu' me, Mukuro-san. I know it was you, anyway. You cause enough trouble, that is."

The fork-possessed pineapple pouted a little before his face contorted into another triumphant grin worthy of Bel.

"So, as I was saying, I'm deciding to lay down a few rules. Those who don't follow them have their own punishments. Reborn has already agreed to this, since he's the only one who doesn't cause trouble."

"I have to object, Tsunayoshi-kun. What does my poor Chrome have to do with any of this."

"Eto? You didn't notice? She's trying to leek photos of all the guardians together because of her yaoi disease she got from Shamale, not like she needed the mosquito bite to do all these things. She's also had encouragement from you, why does she have so much doujin-books in her room?"

"Kufufu~ I just wanted her to-"

"No, Mukuro. I don't want to hear it. Besides that, she's also been setting up random people to her own pleasure. I'll be explaining punishment now.

Gokudera-san. I'll make someone else my right-hand man.

Yamamoto. I'll throw your katana into the incinerator.

Kyoya. You're not allow to fuck m-. No. Don't give me that smirk. It's _you _who can't live without it.

Mukuro. I'll send you back to Vin-. That's to harsh...You're probably thinking that I can't think of anymore punishments for you. So, if you break the rules, I'll personally cut your hair and take your stupid fork away.

Nii-san. I'll cut you from any access to boxing.

Chrome. I'll take away your yaoi.

Lambo, I'll tell I-pin to ignore you until you behave again. Of course she'll listen-"

"Dame-Tsuna. You've been droning on and on about the 'rules'. What are they?"

"E-eh? Reborn! I thought you went to Germany to-"

"I did, and I came back.

So, No-good Tsuna. Hurry up and tell us the rules so I can take the stupid cow back to my room."

"...Use the room on the east of the building. The _far _east.

So, now then:

'_The Rules of the Vongola Household'_

_None shall steal Sawada Tsunayoshi's boxers. (Preferably directed to Rokudo Mukuro.)_

_None shall...have their activities in the corridors. (To Gokudera-san and Yamamoto.)_

_None shall blow up ANY part of the household. (To everyone.)_

_None shall dye Hibird in pink...or any other colors for that matter. (To Gokudera-san.)"_


	2. Omake: XBurner and Pineapples

Disclaimer: I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

A/N: Did I rush this?

**Sayaemogirl-**Haha. Thanks for the first review. By the way, my friend said the EXACT same thing as you did. **Black Rose-Silver Moonlight- **I did continue. It's this Omake. xD **yuu-kang-** And that was my favorite part, nonetheless. **Tsuki no Akebono-**I should try that sometime. **Suzuru Seiyo-**I also loved making up the rules. **LilyMoonstone-**I would dare, not. **Stormypeach1396-**This omake is dedicated to you. Hope you enjoy. **RuriKamiya- **Here's your second chapter…omake…thing.**ezcap1st- **Exactly what I was thinking. **AiZuS-**Very Epic, indeed. Haha. I love my OTP's…As to your other question about Tsuna catching them…The world may never know OAO. **Ai-chi5024-**I hope you received the pm I sent to you about the numbers. I'm sure you'll get used to them and remember them in no time.

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Ah, the sweet, sweet smell of roses in the morning. I for one, think they are the most beautiful things on the planet from what I've been through. Unfortunately, my day was utterly ruined by the damned pineapple. So I have dubbed my plan, X-Burner-Pineapple.

Usually, I wouldn't be doing this, considering my position as Vongola head, but I couldn't help it, and what better way to "prank" someone than to ask the king and queen of pranking: Bel and his abnormally weird sidekick Fran.

_And so our quest begins…_

"Ushishishi~ You need stupid frog and my help, do you know?"

"You know I would hate asking you this, Belphegor, but I honestly need your help to prank…Mukuro."

"Mukuro-sempai?" The average-heighted monotone speaking frog called out. "He'd do anything if Cu-ro-me would be safe."

"…Chrome?"

oOoOoOoOo

"B-bossu? Are you sure?"

"Don't worry Chrome-chan. It's just for a while. I need you to role-play with me. It's…training for when I meet other women from mafia famiglias."

"W-well. If Bossu says it fine, then…I'll be happy to help, it's just that…I don't think Mukuro-sama will be happy with this."

_That's the point._

"It's fine, Chrome. He doesn't come to this part of the estate anyway. Well then, should we start?"

"H-hai."

oOoOoOoOo

"Oh, it's such a pleasure to have such a young and beautiful woman at my party." The young Vongola said with such suavity.

"I-it's m-my pleasure t-to be in Vongola's p-presence."

I leaned a bit closer to her with only a few inches of air keeping our faces from touching.

_Just a little longer and Fran should have the idiot running over here…_

Unfortunately, it didn't go as planned and I slipped, pulling Chrome down with me. After waking up from the daze, I soon found her straddling in my…not so innocent part of my lower region. Even more unfortunately, it was this exact moment when Mukuro-san showed up with a giant fork-stabbed frog trailing behind him.

_Oh karma, screw you._

"Chrome-chan? What are you doing to my innocent little Tsunayoshi-chan?"

"O-oh! Mukuro-sama, I didn't t-think you would c-come."

_Ah, poor girl._

I watched her run away without hesitation until I felt another weight being put onto…that place. Turning my head to look at what idiot would sit on my, I found none other than the King of All Pervert, excluding Hibari, sitting there –on my lap –with a damn smirk on his face.

"Oya, Tsunayoshi-chan~ Only I, Mukuro, may straddle your hips like this."

And that was when I had enough of this fooliness.

oOoOoOoOoOo

"-doors, five windows, ten chairs, and one of Daemon Spade's busts. What were you doing to the bastard, Juudaime?"

"A-ano. I'm sorry everyone. I-it's just that…Mukuro-san was being a p-pain and I tried to-"

"Pineapple herbivore."

I stood up from my place from the meeting room and saw the look of Hibari –murderous. Said person looked over to me and dragged me into a spare bedroom as fast as you could say "Pineapple", poor maids.

Oh dammit, today's going to be such a pain in the ass.

* * *

AHAHAHA! See what I did there? Last line…anyone? "Pain in the ass." Like…what Hibari- Oh nevermind. You smart people will get it.

**ALWAYS REMEMBER:REVIEWS ARE THE SOURCE OF LOVE, DARKESTEND MUST FEAST ON THEM…or something along those lines.**

I'm sorry if this wasn't what you were expecting. I tried. (Probably.)


End file.
